Thursday, August 28, 2008

a little dream psychology

I had a dream about the little lady last night. There were some strange elements—I came to the hospital to have a baby but didn’t feel or remember much of anything until she was born. She was absolutely beautiful but was somehow already able to walk. The most disturbing part was that I never established any sort of real attachment to her. I kept leaving her behind and forgetting about her, and I had this intense anxiety that I had entirely missed my chance to bond with her. Here she was, already walking, and I didn’t even know how to feed her.

Except for the fact that she was a drop-dead gorgeous baby, I think this might be categorized as a nightmare.

Lately, I’ve been doing a lot of the necessary research on labor and delivery, and I feel convicted by my dream--that maybe I'm becoming paranoid and not trusting God. Information is good, but I can't let it make me worry. Prayer would be good. Yes, maybe I should go pray. Ok, I'm gonna go pray now.

1 comment:

Theresa Koehler said...

I had a dream about you and your daughter last week too! It was like 30 seconds long. I was in the church parking lot, and I saw you from where I was sitting in my car, at the same time that I experienced walking with you (odd how dreams do that). You walked over to your car to put the little one in her carseat, and the back seat window on the driver's side was COVERED in cling-on stickers. I pointed them out and you laughed and said, Yeah, she loves to do that. And that was the end of the dream. Funny thing is, you definitely called her by three different names in that conversation we had, one of which is my current favorite girl's name, so I'll be waiting on the edge of my seat until December to see if one of them is right :)

That said, you will be a wonderful mother, because you are a wonderful Meghan. I can't wait to see the two of you together :) Love ya!